Seann Walsh wishes he had "stuck up for himself" more in the wake of his and Katya Jones’ controversial kiss last year, and claims he was "demonised" following the smooch.
The 34-year-old comedian says his life has been "traumatic" and he has experienced a "tough year, mentally" since he and his ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ pro partner were caught kissing on a night out last year, when both had partners at the time, and he regrets not standing up for himself more following the backlash.
He said: "The first three weeks [of ‘Strictly’], it was the best three weeks of my life.
"I was having the time of my life, and then it all went very, very wrong.
"I would say that … you know, no one wants to hear me sort of stick up for myself, but I wish I’d stuck up for myself more. And I think I’ve served my time. It’s been a tough year, mentally, and I lost a lot out of it, personally, but also job-wise I lost a lot of opportunities.
"I think I did go through … what I went through, I don’t mind saying, that it wasn’t fair.
"Now, what I did wasn’t right. I appreciate that and I understand that.
"But I did not deserve … you know, it wasn’t just the tabloids, it was in the broadsheets as well, and it was online … I still look back and I don’t really know what I could have done differently.
"I had to just take it. And it was too much. I still … I wake up some days and I feel OK, and some days I wake up and it feels like it happened yesterday.
"And it’s traumatic. I’m very conscious of going, ‘God, do I look like I’m looking for sympathy?’ I don’t want to. These are just the facts."
The ‘Bad Move’ actor admits he now lives in "paranoia and fear", particularly when people recognise him, because he wonders what their opinion is of him.
Speaking on Richard Herring’s ‘Leicester Square Theatre Podcast’, he added: "It was so strange. All the hatred that would be chucked your way online, and on the comments pieces and stuff like that.
"That was weird, sort of losing that control of who you are.
"You know, it does affect me. In London, you see someone on the Tube and they recognise me and you just get so paranoid of what their idea of you is. Which bit have they read? Do they care? You sort of live in paranoia and fear."
Seann’s latest comments come after he joked in August that he is going to "hell" following Katya’s split with her husband Neil Jones, who is also a ‘Strictly’ pro.
Just hours after the pair’s split announcement, Seann referenced their break up during a show at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival’s Pleasance Dome, telling the crowd: "I am aware they announced they are splitting up. I have no reaction."
He then joked: "I will see you in hell."
Seann also made a joke about being in bed with Katya after the photos of their infamous kiss were released.
He quipped: "On the Friday I am in the hotel so the paps can’t find me – secret location, very showbiz.
"I get into bed and ask Katya to pass me the remote."
He added: "The year I’ve had? I can make that joke."