Kirk Norcross says suffering from attention attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) made him hate himself.
The former 'The Only Way Is Essex' star was diagnosed with ADHD, which causes hyperactivity and impulsiveness, when he was in school and he found it difficult to control his behaviour.
He said: "I knew what I was doing but something would definitely come over me and I'd just see red. It was so weird. For instance, I'd go to kick the door a little bit, but actually it would end up being totally smashed up."
The reality star is still approached by former school mates who remember him beating them up and he still feels "so embarrassed" about his actions.
Kirk added to Now magazine: "I'd fight my mates for no reason. I remember at my 16th birthday my mate ate some of my cake, so I really beat him up. Afterwards I was so sorry and had no idea why I'd done it.
"I hated myself and I still do. Sometime I'll bump into someone from my school days and they'll say to me 'Do you remember when you beat me up?' I feel so embarrassed."

Jennifer Lopez thinks her 'Dance Again' world tour was a "turning point" in her life.
The 'I Luh Ya Papi' singer found it easy getting back into the studio after her 2012 tour because the experience helped give her a new perspective on her divorce from Marc Anthony and her career.
Discussing the recording process of her upcoming album, the 'American Idol' judge told PopCrush: "My goal was to just be as honest as I could. You know, I'd gone through a lot in my life right at that point when I went on tour. I'd been through a divorce.
"A lot of things had happened. I really felt like it was a turning point in my life. I'd learned a lot about myself. I grew out my perspective on a lot of things - changes, including love - and there was just a lot that I had to say. Plus I had grown as a performer and as a vocalist on the road. All of that stuff is in this album."
The 44-year-old star - who has six-year-old twins Max and Emme with her ex-husband - has since found love with choreographer Casper Smart and admits her views on romance have been turned on their head since her "devastating" split from the father of her children.
Jennifer added: "My topic is love. It always has been. It's my motivation. It's what I think about. That's who I am at the essence. But what I thought about love for my first nine albums is very different from what I think about it now after everything I've been through."

Stars have shown their support for World Water Day.
Celebrities including Gwyneth Paltrow, Jessie J and Beyonce have taken to social media sites to help promote charity Drop4Drop's efforts to provide clean water for everyone.
'Iron Man' actress Gwyneth posted a make-up free selfie on Instagram of her drinking from a bottle of water, captioning the image, "full of healing power. #iLoveWater #WorldWaterday@drop4drop".
Jessie J rallied her fans to the cause, reminding them to appreciate their easy access to water and asking them to donate.
She wrote alongside an image of her sipping from a glass of water: "Don't take water for granted! I love water! This #WorldWaterDay let's make a difference! #iLoveWater @drop4drop".
Lily Allen and Example have also shared their love for H2O with Instagram selfies, while the charity reposted a message from Beyonce's official Facebook page, thanking the superstar for drawing people's attention to their campaign.
World Water Day, which has been observed on 22 March since 1993, aims to promote awareness of the critical water issues facing our generation and raise money for the 800 million people in third world countries who risk their lives by drinking and using dirty water.

Brad Pitt partied with Kings of Leon on Friday night (21.03.14).
The actor hit the town with the 'Sex On Fire' rockers after their Los Angeles gig and made a beeline straight for the band at their official afterparty, held at Warwick bar and restaurant.
The 'World War Z' star arrived with 'The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button' writer, Eric Roth, in tow and only headed home at around 3am, according to the MailOnline.
Brad also rubbed shoulders with actor Garett Hedlund, who stars in the Kings of Leon's arty music video, 'Beautiful War'.
The Nashville-based band, formed of brothers Caleb, Jared and Nathan Followill and their cousin Matthew Followill, are currently on a world tour supporting their sixth album, 'Mechanical Bull'.
Brad - who raises Maddox, 12, Pax, 10, Zahara, nine, Shiloh, seven, and twins Knox and Vivienne, five, with his fiancée Angelina Jolie - is rarely seen without his brood these days.
He recently confessed he bases his career choices nowadays on whether he will be proud to show his films to his children.
He said: "The key for me [when choosing a film] is to leave something behind that will make my kids proud.
"I want to be able to show my films to my children and say, 'Your daddy made this.'

Kristin Cavallari's husband is "weirded out" by pregnancy sex.
'The Hills' star admits her partner Jay Cutler feels uncomfortable being intimate during pregnancy and doesn't like talking about their future child when they're beneath the sheets.
Kristin - who is expecting her second son in May - explained in the new issue of Fit Pregnancy magazine: "Sex is funny when you're pregnant. Guys get weird about it. I'm like, 'Oh Jay, the baby's kicking!' And he's like, not wanting to know about it.
"It's important for women to realize - if your guy is a little weirded out but isn't good at expressing that, it can be isolating."
However, the reality star has come up with a fail-safe plan to restore the romance.
She joked: "Lingerie always helps too."
The 27-year-old shoe designer - who tied the knot with Jay in June 2013 - is already a mother to Camden, 19 months, and is glad the couple decided to have children so early on in their marriage.
She said: "It's cute to see Jay as such a great dad! We're excited to do this while we're young. Then when the kids go to college, we can travel and do whatever we want."
Fans won't be seeing Kristin and the Chicago Bears quarterback's children on TV screens any time soon since they intend to keep their family life private.
She revealed: "We get reality show offers all the time and we're like, 'No'. Family is so sacred, why mess with that?"

Kevin Bacon recreated his iconic 'Footloose' dance scenes on 'The Tonight Show'.
The 55-year-old actor marked the 30th anniversary of the film's release by launching into a step-by-step routine of his most famous toe-tapping moments as teenager Ren McCormack during his appearance on the chat show Friday night (21.03.14).
The age-defying star proved he still had the moves in the special segment set up by host Jimmy Fallon.
Drawing boos from the studio audience, the presenter introduced Kevin by saying: "This year marks the 30th anniversary of one of his most beloved films, 'Footloose'. Which reminds me, I should quickly mention that dancing has been outlawed on the tonight show."
Holding up a scroll emblazoned with the strict decree, Jimmy added: "It's official guys, it's a bummer, but rules are rules!"
The programme then cut to Kevin, who was watching behind-the-scenes from his dressing room.
The incredulous star announced, "Jump back. This is 'The Tonight Show' - there has to be dancing!", and proceeded to recreate his famous dance number to the classic soundtrack of 'Never'.
The father-of-two's performance was pitch perfect, even puffing on a cigarette and taking a swig from a bottle of booze before smashing it against the wall - just as his character did in the iconic warehouse scene.
Joined by backing dancers, he shimmied through the hallways of the 'Tonight Show' studio and emerged in front of the audience, clad in a vintage maroon tuxedo.
Shouting his infamous line, "Let's dance!, Kevin launched into a show-stopped finale of Footloose's titular track to rapturous applause.

Amanda Bynes celebrated her fashion debut with her parents on Friday night (21.03.14).
The actress, who went through a public breakdown last year, looked happy and healthy as she attended a special event for new students held by the prestigious Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising in Los Angeles.
The 'She's The Man' star has just completed her first quarter at the university and seemed back to her bubbly self as she shared a series of photos from the 2014 FIDM Debut on Twitter, including a family snap with her proud parents Rick and Lynn, who have supported her throughout her ordeal.
She later posted a picture from the fashion school's runway presentation, writing: "Some of the many beautiful designs from last night!"
This marks one of the first times Amanda has used the social networking site since leaving rehab and enrolling at FIDM in December 2013 in a bid to carve out a career as a fashion designer.
The 27-year-old star - whose hair is back to a natural-looking blonde - first updated her fans about her whereabouts on March 1.
She announced: "Hi everyone! I'm busy studying at @FIDM but I want to say I love you to my fans! Xoxo".
Amanda completed three months of psychiatric treatment for both schizophrenia and bipolar disorder last winter following several concerning outbursts.
She is said to be "horrified" by the erratic comments she made on Twitter last year, and has deleted her past activity so she can start afresh.
In February, she escaped jail and a fine in her driving under the influence (DUI) case, but was placed on three years' probation and ordered to attend three months of alcohol education classes.

The 'Divergent' cast partied non-stop during filming.
The stars of the year's most-anticipated teen thriller - who include Shailene Woodley, Theo James, Zoë Kravitz and Miles Teller - got on so well that sleep-deprived neighbours had to call the cops on several occasions to break up their raucous post-filming gatherings in downtown Chicago.
Shailene said at a Cinema Society screening: "There was a lot of partying, and I think the cops did get called a few times. When you work long hours you want to hang out on Friday night and be loud, it's not really fair to the people next door when they're like, 'It's 4 a.m., shut the f**k up.' "
Director Neil Burger also admitted he found dealing with a group of young actors under the age of 25 a far trickier task than he signed up for.
According to the New York Post's Page Six, the filmmaker said: "[It was] like wrangling cats. They were constantly on the verge of getting kicked out of their hotel."
Theo James, who plays Dauntless member Tobias 'Four' Eaton in the upcoming movie, recently confessed the gang had bonded over boozy nights out.
He said: "You really had to dive in and become friends with everyone - getting f***ed up and having nights on the town always eases that."

Isaac Hanson has become a father for the third time.
The eldest Hanson brother and his wife Nikki welcomed a daughter called Nina Odette on March 11 and are delighted to finally have a girl in the family.
The 33-year-old musician told People magazine: "After more than five years of not having a baby in the house, having our first little girl is going to be fun. I know that Everett and Monroe are excited about being big brothers."
Nina, who weighed a healthy 7lbs. 15 oz., is no doubt going to be spoiled by her older brothers, Clark Everett, six, and five-year-old James Monroe.
Hanson are best known for their smash hit 'MMMBop', which catapulted the long-haired brothers into the limelight in the late 90s.
The group - also formed of Taylor and Zac - are still going strong and recently wrapped a world tour supporting their ninth studio album, 'Anthem'.
Middle brother Taylor, 31, and his wife Natalie have five children - Ezra, 11, Penelope, eight, River, seven, Viggo, five, and 17 month old Wilhelmina - while youngest brother Zac, 28, and his wife Kate have three kids - Shepherd, five, Junia, three, and Abraham, five months.

Doutzen Kroes is expecting a baby girl.
The Victoria's Secret model has revealed that she and her husband Sunnery James are set to welcome a daughter in late July.
The blonde beauty shared a fresh-faced snapshot on her Instagram account, which showed her posing with a big smile on her make-up free face.
She captioned the image: "Almost 6 months pregnant with a girl #happy".
The couple are already parents to a three-year-old son, Phyllon. They have been dating since 2009 and tied the knot in Amsterdam four and a half years ago.
The 29-year-old model's fans were overjoyed by the news and quickly congratulated her, gushing, "you are so perfect and so beautiful! Best wishes!!" and, "Congrats beautiful!"
Dutch-born Doutzen announced she was pregnant back in February by posting a tasteful nude photograph on the social media site.
She wrote alongside the black-and-white image: "This is not a #throwbackthursday this is now! So happy to share with you that we are expecting".
DJ and producer Sunnery said at the time: "Super happy to announce that we're expecting new love in our life! My beautiful wifey is pregnant."

James Franco and Seth Rogen have spoofed Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's VOGUE cover.
The actors poked fun of the US magazine's controversial new cover, which was unveiled yesterday (21.03.14) to mass uproar from the fashion world, by photoshopping their heads onto the couple's body in a mock-up version of the April issue's defining image.
The fashion bible's cover - which was shot by famed photographer Annie Leibovitz - shows reality star Kim looking demure in a strapless Lanvin wedding gown as Kanye wraps his arms around his bride-to-be, the concept a nod to their upcoming nuptials in Paris this May.
James posted his digitally-altered handiwork on Instagram, jokingly adding: "Seth! Love you, dog!"
His fans' response was overwhelmingly positive, with one enthusing, "Omg what a beautiful couple!!!", and another noting, "A much better cover photo".
This isn't the first time renowned jokers Seth and James have mocked Kanye and Kim. Last November, they filmed a spoof of Kanye's 'Bound 2' video, which sees the comedians imitating the cringe-inducing video by smooching shirtless on the back of a motorbike.
Meanwhile, the Muppets have also joined in on the act, with puppet power couple Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy recreating Kimye's VOGUE cover.
Sharing the image on Facebook, Miss Piggy said: "Kermie and Moi are honored to be featured on the cover of Vague as the #UniversesMostTalkedAboutCouple!! (Are you surprised, though?)"
VOGUE Editor-in-Chief Anna Wintour - who previously declared Kim would appear in the magazine "over her dead body" - has defended her cover star choice in the Editor's letter of April's Shape issue, explaining that she admires Kim's "strength of character."
She added that the magazines prides itself on "being able to feature those who define the culture at any given moment, who stir things up, whose presence in the world shapes the way it looks and influences the way we see it."

L'Wren Scott's funeral will be held in Los Angeles.
The decision to hold the late fashion designer's wake on the West Coast instead of in New York City was made by her older brother Randall Bambrough and her long-term partner Sir Mick Jagger, The New York Post's Page Six reports.
Randall was in the Big Apple on Friday (21.03.13) for the sad task of identifying his adoptive sister's body after the Medical Examiner's office confirmed L'Wren's cause of death was suicide.
The model-turned-designer was tragically found hanging by her assistant in her Manhattan apartment on Monday morning (17.03.14).
Mick is being comforted by his children in LA after flying in on Thursday (20.03.13) and the rock legend was alleged to feel "too raw" to return to New York, where he had recently purchased a home with L'Wren.
The Rolling Stones singer has only just returned from Perth, cancelling the 'Brown Sugar' hitmakers' tour of Australia and New Zealand as soon as he heard the shocking news.
L'Wren's body is reportedly still at Frank E. Campbell Funeral Chapel in Manhattan's Upper East Side, but will be flown to Los Angeles this weekend.
It also now appears L'Wren's brother Randall has barred their sister Jan Shane from attending the service.
Ron Shane, Jan's husband told The New York Post: "Randy is trying to keep Jan from being able to attend any services."
The designer's family had previously expressed their desire for the 49-year-old star to be laid to rest in her hometown of Utah.