Caitlyn Jenner "still loves Bruce" but is happier than she has ever been.
The 66-year-old former Olympian – who was known as Bruce Jenner before her gender transition last year – is finally content since revealing her true self but still maintains a great deal of affection for Bruce.
Speaking to Sports Illustrated to celebrate the 40th anniversary of her decathlon win at the 1976 Summer Olympic Games, she said: "I loved Bruce. I still love him today. I like what he did and the way he set an example for hard work and dedication. I’m proud of that part of my life. But this woman was living inside me, all my life, and it reached the point where I had to let her live and put Bruce inside. And I am happier, these last 12 months, than I’ve ever been in my life.
"Little Caitlyn has been in there since I was young. Sometimes she raised her cute little head more than others. I was female inside, but I wasn’t an effeminate male. So I could hide easily in the male world. My life was distraction after distraction after distraction. Being a macho male was a way for me to try to convince myself that the woman living inside of me really isn’t living inside me. Obviously, it didn’t work."
Caitlyn also refused to reveal if she plans to undergo gender reassignment surgery, insisting. "It’s nobody’s business whether I want to do that to my body."
And Caitlyn admitted that the decathlon was "the perfect distraction" from her gender dysphoria.
She explained: "The decathlon was the perfect distraction. Sports. It’s not real life. You go out there, you work hard, you train your ass off, win the Games. I’m very proud of that part of my life. And it’s not like I just want to throw it out. It’s part of who I am. What I’m dealing with now, this is about who you are as a human being. What did I do for the world in 1976, besides maybe getting a few people to exercise a little bit? I didn’t make a difference in the world."
However, she admitted she found it hard to look at her body back then as she was so unhappy with it.
She said: "It disgusted me. I was big and thick and masculine. The rest of the world thought it was this Greek god kind of body. I hated it. But it’s what I was given, so I just tried to do the best I could with it."