Ashley James has felt her body dysmorphia "creeping back in".
The model and presenter admits it has been tough coping with her body image issues in the midst of the lockdown, with the coronavirus pandemic, as she has been unable to get her weekly spray tans.
She said: "Let’s talk about body confidence in lockdown … I talk about feeling comfortable in your own skin a lot, but I’m not going to lie, being in lockdown has been testing for me in terms of my own body image and I’ve felt my body dysmorphia creeping back in … ‘We don’t do this anymore’, I keep telling myself, as I remind myself that I am more than my body. Sexiness is not defined by the shape of our bodies, it’s a state of mind. Our beauty is not defined by how toned or tanned we are. We just have to look around at all the beautiful women we know (or don’t know) to see that. We judge ourselves more than others. (sic)"
And the 33-year-old star confessed she looked for validation from others in the height of her body dysmorphia.
She added in her lengthy post: "Being stripped of my weekly spray tans has made me realise that a lot of my confidence depended on feeling tanned. I feel better with a tan. Maybe because I associate it with how positive I feel when I travel, or maybe just because I’ve grown used to seeing my body that way, or because it’s seen as sexy. Either way … Here I am without a tan. When my dysmorphia used to creep in, or when I struggled with my body image, I would take the hottest photo I could and post it to social media. I needed that validation. I needed people to ‘like’ what they saw to make me feel better. And it did, but not deep down. Not really. Ironically, I was a lingerie model during this time, further proof that my lack of self esteem and confidence had nothing to do with how my body looked. If we’re feeling bad about our body, we need to work on our minds, not our bodies (although of course exercise is great), because if your happiness is dependent on an aesthetic goal, you’ll probably never feel like you’ve reached it. And the problem with seeking validation from others is that you’re putting all your happiness in their hands, which also means they have the power to make you miserable too. (sic)"